If i put a coin in my back left trouser pocket.

so,to take this a little further,When people say to you "something is on your left hand side"they really mean "the something is on your left eye side".

And to compound things I can not rotate my left hand in a clock wise direction while rotating my left leg in an anti clock wise direction.

And the guy on the radio will say "Chelsea are playing from right to left in the first half,"but if he is on the other side of the pitch they are playing from left to right so it would help if he told us which side of the pitch HE is on.

what if you put a coin under yer wig. will yo have money on yer mind all day?

Still wearing those elasticated waist slacks off the back page of the Sunday supplements I see.