things you don't approve of in the workplace

work.

piles of sand & blocks

Naked group hugs.

Women.

People who don't wash their hands after they have had a jimmy riddle

tomato plants craftily concealed on red pallets so they blend in

full sex and bladderation

Workshops

Low-hanging fruit
Blue sky thinking
Getting up to speed

feng shui

Ugly fat birds

Secret Santas

using a segway to get around the office

Framed pairs of old underpants belonging to Martin "Rolfie" Adams.  A sackable offence.

i_agree_with_nick  • June 1, 2015 10:17 PM BST 
Low-hanging fruit
Blue sky thinking
Getting up to speed

Worked with a guy and all he did was speak like that.

"I don't want you to be getting to the top of the ladder and finding you're on the wrong building"
"We should all be sailing in the same boat"

Drove me not only insane but to early retirement.

phones

computers

Talking of segways, this is kind of fun but not really practical?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1YoCfm7nxU
(it's like a unicyle motorbike)

I'd allow them in the office

People like some of the w*nkers you get on here.

But at least you don't get trolls and keyboard warriors at work.

The endless laminations.

Dressing normally on a Friday.

sales people chanting to build their morale.

nasty Halford's tools instead of proper Snap-On gear

people not flushing the khasi after they have had a brad pitt!

things you don't approve of in the workplace

Misplacing the preposition in a sentence.

It is something up with which I will not put

cc'd emails

I once worked in an insurance broker accounts office that operated a email signing off policy.  This required all external emails to be printed out, checked and then stamped by the manager before being sent out.  At the end of every month the managers would then panic due to the millions of uncollected premiums and wonder why this had occurred

Colleagues who prove to be too thick and idle to do the job for which they applied, so have to be promoted to management instead

darts with **** flights

People who eat at their desks. I worked with a woman who would take all day to eat a banana! She would sometimes leave half of it for the next day. One nibble every 1/2 hour. By 11 it was brown and stinking the place out. I used to dream of a U.S.A friendly fire drone attack taking her out with a precision hellfire air to surface missile on my day off.

Not hard to spot who has been an office worker all his life when the smell of a banana offends his nose.

Crapping in the office plants.

This:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3BNsttZQGQ

anyone from Spain, France, Switzerland

anyone from Spain, France, Switzerland

What do you want to know about Spain?

Duz the rine sty minely on the pline?

not buying cream cakes on your birthday

w*nking

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKH9ECC_Qa4

Backstabbing insincerity of those desperate to get promotion.

empire builders

People who eat fish in the office.
People who don't do their fair share of tea making.
People, mainly women, who turn their desks into fcking picture galleries, with their ugly kids staring out from all corners.
Office 'drinks'. Basically a bunch of cretins standing round a desk sipping cheap wine, eating cheesy breadsticks and talking ****. A little group of us would tolerate one drink then disappear. People thought we were boring. They didn't realise that while they were tucked up in bed that night, we were in the Raymond Revue bar necking vodka and slipping twenty pound notes into Swedish birds drawers.

Getting hold of sexyterries at the xmas party and sitting them on the photocopier has been frowned upon a few times.