They used to be called ...

Aye, we used to look out for our fellow man.................but now it's all Me! Me! Me!

I've got degrees!!!!! - I didn't realise.  Undersold myself.

Suspend monkeys - Betfair Customer Services

lol it would be so funny if betfair actually put out a job advert looking for suspend monkeys!

naydam -  'we used to look out for our fellow man'.........what century was that? if you don't mind me asking.

Naydam & Dewey,
we still look out for our fellow man ... and when he's not being careful we snatch his money from the cash machine, or we sneak round the back and burgle his house, or if he's in an accident we film him on our cameras.
Yes, we live in a caring society.

nobody has ever mugged me, burgled me, assaulted me, picked my pocket, stole my bag or anything. i guess ive just been lucky?

two kids did try to mug me once, one of em said "give me your money"...i looked at him and laughed and said piss off im not giving you my money. and they did. obviously ive been threatened by kids and drunks loads of times, but nobody has ever actually laid a finger on me. it does feel like society is more violent though. but maybe were just getting old so it feels worse? who knows.

I've had gun pointed at me and crossbow and been shot numerous times with air rifles and stabbed in the leg and I come from a quiet little town.Seen stabbings,someone kicked so much they got brain damage there's some right ****s around early hours of the morning!Strnge thing is when I used to go to raves every week everyone off their tits,no trouble whatsoever and great atmosphere,alcohol is the worst drug of all..

wow. what quiet little town is this?? im from a large city. and ive walked home in the early hours lots of times, not just here but in other cities too. obviously not walking home lol, walking back to the hotel or whatever. the other year i was stuck in the arse-end of edinburgh at 3am after a gig. had no idea how to even get back in to the city centre, had to ask about 10 random people along the way. waited in the train station til the morning and to cap it off i had a union jack t shirt on but had no bother off anybody. i was actually expecting trouble of some kind due to the shirt.

>wives and husbands - now they're partners

I don't mind saying partner. It can make things confusing though, as you can refer to a work colleague you're in business with as your partner too.

'girlfriend' just seems a bit immature and 'wife' is inaccurate and a little scary.

Opal Fruits-now Starburst

Marathon Bars- now Snickers

Builder's sales office- now Marketing Suite

Personnel- now Human Resources

Transport- now Logistics

Jif- now Cif

Subway sandwich maker- now Sandwich Artist

erse2
Don't mind partner for girlfriend/boyfriend when you're older (but can be very confusing as you say) but I get irritated when I'm asked for my "parner's name, etc".  FFS she's my WIFE.

Oh and schoolchildren or pupils are now students.
Not really relevant to my response to you but I just thought of it.

Frank - Kellie

Try having a partner called Jo.  They immediately think you're a homosexual, sorry gay.

Technical Colleges and Polytechnics are now all Universities.
And even the most basic qualification entitles you to don the cloak and mortar board and receive
a rolled up certificate from some B list celebrity.

someone who makes coffe in a caff....BARISTA ffs!

leaving school and getting a job - now graduation (with all the ceremony - often from a former College of FE or Technical college) and going on the dole

(when will they ever learn, when will they e-ever learn?)

Grade C is now Grade A*

Thames Ironworks F.C. - West Ham United
Oil Of Ulay - Oil Of Olay
So bad you got sacked - resigned
a gallon - fiveanarfleeters
The M25 - fackingbastardsh1thouseroad
Sussex - Paul McCartney's back garden

homosexuals - gay

rug munchers - lesbians
lesbians - gay

What used to be called "Telling the truth" is now called "Hate Crime".

.................... or racist

gravy is now called, well anything that sounds more expensive than gravy does

sideshowbob
14 Aug 14 04:02
Joined:
19 Oct 05
| Topic/replies: 10,688 | Blogger: sideshowbob's blog
wow. what quiet little town is this?? im from a large city. and ive walked home in the early hours lots of times, not just here but in other cities too. obviously not walking home lol, walking back to the hotel or whatever. the other year i was stuck in the arse-end of edinburgh at 3am after a gig. had no idea how to even get back in to the city centre, had to ask about 10 random people along the way. waited in the train station til the morning and to cap it off i had a union jack t shirt on but had no bother off anybody. i was actually expecting trouble of some kind due to the shirt.



You wont get much trouble ion Edinburgh ever unless maybe you went into some estates

unemployment - scrounger

it was the edinburgh corn exchange the gig, dunno if you know that area. i dont. first time id ever been to edinburgh, got there in a taxi had no idea where i was. asked some really funny drunk people for directions. 1 bloke seemed determined to give me directions to the wrong station, cos he thought i was from newcastle and apparently the train from that station gets to newcastle quicker or summat i dunno! then i asked 3 chinese student types and none of spoke english. was fooking hilarious trying to do choo choo sign language with random chinese people at 3-4 in the morning!

police department is
now the police force

think about it