who stole the first o in middlesbrough?

They didn't, it's right there, after the 'r'.

and why does hampshire get shortened to hants, when there isnt even an n or a t in the damn word?

Well I'm not going to get you started on Oxfordshire.

yeh but. everywhere else has 2 o's. peterborough. loughborough. scarborough.

and LiverpOOl

They nick anything in Liverpool,
It used to be called Olioveropool.

who put the c unt in Scunthorpe ?

Edinburgh ain't got two 'ose.  Mon Repose 'as.

I heard Wigan stole the 'o' but then swapped it for a 'a' because the town was overrun with baldies.