England / Rooney Perceptions.

Frankie Boyle writes : "A referee said that Rooney has trouble dealing with authority. He's probably still angry from all the electric shocks he received when trying to get the banana without having to get the ball into the goal first."

From the newspaper CLARIN before an England V Paraguay game at a previous World Cup : "The Drunkards of the Plank had breakfast in the confectionery of the Monumental one and left without problems."