I BECAME A LONE PARENT 2 DAYS AGO.

dont get it

ull need it

good luck with that.

lone parent?

exactly

g/l with this mission mate

good luck

difference between an ex and an International terroist is that u can negotiate with the latter.

tell you mate if sheep could cook we would"nt need women for fick all

^ cant argue

Don't waste your breath...... she's treated you like rubbish for 15 years - another 9 months won't matter........

Lay down some rules and make sure he sticks to them.
Dont be afraid to use the naughty step ;)
Good luck :)

If the ex does decide to pay up then make sure your kid goes onto to do a 7 year course at uni, she has to pay until he finishes his education....

Hoss 10 Jan 16:27
Lay down some rules and make sure he sticks to them.
Dont be afraid to use the naughty step
Good luck

lol,Hoss

:)

Get the Child Benefit book off her, you can claim until his 19th birthday and it's a criminal offence if she draws a penny after he left her house. Then demand cash for winter clothes for him followed by a demand for spring clothes when the snow melts. If she gets any form of housing or council tax benefit, make sure the council know to reduce or stop it. You've only got a few months so milk it fast.

I'm just gonna ask for maintenance commensurate to what I have paid. I appreciate it might be a bit less as I earn more.
But it won't leave her in any more hardship than I have been. She'd had over 40 grand off me.

I'll get Child Benefit too.

Gallivanter 10 Jan 16:44


Get the Child Benefit book off her


Child Benefit book?
This isn't the Jeremy Kyle Show.
We have bank accounts!

I doubt you will get it. But there is precedent for adult children suing parents directly for support whilst at college.

We have bank accounts!

I forgot that benefits were paid into banks these days. I used to see Princess Di down the post office on a Tuesday collecting her Child Benefit.

sibaroni 10 Jan 17:57


I doubt you will get it. But there is precedent for adult children suing parents directly for support whilst at college.




If she has any decency, she will cough up.

"If she has any decency, she will cough up."

You could be waiting some time, women do do 'giving money to ex's'

Ten2follower,

Mate, if you can afford it forget the money. Don't bother getting ravelled up in that cobblers. You've got your son with you. Enjoy the time. You've only got it the once.

you get child benefit for an 18 yr old?!

mightymoyes 10 Jan 19:25


you get child benefit for an 18 yr old?!


If in full time education.

DaveEdwards 10 Jan 19:23


Ten2follower,

Mate, if you can afford it forget the money. Don't bother getting ravelled up in that cobblers. You've got your son with you. Enjoy the time. You've only got it the once.


I'm only asking for her to trreat me the same way as I have treated her for 15 years.

What liberties?

What's he done that's so bad exactly?


More to this than meets the eye imo.

All 18 year olds treat home like a hotel, i certainly did.

Dick Quax 10 Jan 19:36


What liberties?

What's he done that's so bad exactly?


More to this than meets the eye imo.


Treat house like a hotel, not always informing wherabouts, staying out later than should when at college, swearing when challenged.

I've told him that I'm more easy going, but he's not to take p!ss.

Hmmmmm, i blame the parents. ;)

Nothing wrong with kids treating home as a hotel if they are aware that you are unlikely to find a hotel for less than £40 a night.

What a hero you are?!

Your ex is having problems with your son, but rather thatn try and help them both solve the problem, your first consideration is money!

Do you have any idea how desperate the situation must be for her to show him the door? Quite clearly, she has been the better parent for the past 18 years because she bothered to STAY.

I BECAME A SINGLE PARENT 2 DAYS AGO...........well bully for you. Doubt you'll have to many sleepless nights though. No nappies to change, temperatures to monitor, vomit to clean up. No trying to get him ready for school so your both out on time. No childminder tut tutting when your ten minutes late collecting him.

Tell him to start appreciating and respecting his Mother. SET THE EXAMPLE.

Come, Come...we ALL know "the rules"...any Man who thinks he can get any money out of a Non-Professional high-earning or rich Woman is seriously deluded.

They just do NOT part with it and make so much drama that they will want you to wish you had never brought the subject up!

No! I'm not speaking from my experience but almost everyone I know who has been in some kind of similar situation.

Whats "yours" is "ours" and whats "mine" is "mine"..thats their rules! lol

Tess 10 Jan 19:58


What a hero you are?!

Your ex is having problems with your son, but rather thatn try and help them both solve the problem, your first consideration is money!

Do you have any idea how desperate the situation must be for her to show him the door? Quite clearly, she has been the better parent for the past 18 years because she bothered to STAY.

Er. She had an affair and left me, taking him with her?

What makes you assume that I abandoned them?

tess thinks a fred on here reveals everything about someone, whoosh.

My apologies for assuming the opposite scenario.

And Tess, I've rung and asked her if she's ok and she has just barked "tell him to collect the rest of this stuff!" at me. :(

Tess 10 Jan 20:31


My apologies for assuming the opposite scenario.




But what actually made you assume so?
Apology accepted. :)

Probably a recent split, he will change over time imo.

Really, very sorry! I'm female and it goes with the territiory to blame the man. Actually, I'm not usually so cynical, but your subject title, after reading what you had written, seemed to me like you were looking for praise. Given your son's age, you were obviously being a tad sarcastic.

Tess.
I tought of it as ironic.

Now get back to Angel. :)

Glad you don't want to see me hang?!

The more you write, the more I like you. Are you single? lol

Yes Tess, I'm single.

But I'm a dad first.
And getting my money second.
Social life third!

Gonna be lots of nice young things Knocking at the Door you never know one might bring her fit Milf round to vet the place LOL.

Ha, I agree. I have 3 myself. 2 boys of 25 and17 and a 12 year old Daughter. Wow, I've just given away that I'm the wrong side of 40. We more mature women do have our compensating factors though!!

Tess, I absolutely detest tha attitude of your first post. His mum chucked him out, co-incidentally just at the age it was no longer profitable to have him. Just because she is a mum doesn't make her the better parent; its frankly a 50/50 bet if you know nothing about it. If she can't hack it, i very much expect Ten can, so that is where the lad should be and mother deserves exactly zero support from now on, financial or emotional.

Just spoke to her.

She's happy for me to claim the Child Benefit.

"And what about maintenance?" asks I.

"You can stop paying it," she says.

"What about you paying me some?" I ask.

Stoney silence then a promise to think about it and get back to me. :(

Quel surprise. Not unusual to see custody change at eighteen. One wonders why, hey. As a previous poster said, you have got your boy back, enjoy him.

"Maintenance" Odds:

Yes!= 100/1

No= 1/100......the excuse, er, reason, might sound feasible but Ladies always find a way to NOT hand over money...

Now she tells me she's thinking of asking him back due to the finances.
He says he aint going!

At least you know her true motives now.

that was a given t2.

Tess :x

I haven't worked it out, but I reckon I've forked out £40k.
I'd be getting less than a grand back if she coughed up two thirds of what I have been paying.

Any my boy always has a home here. :)

t2tf i pay 200 for 13 years, my daughter comes around my place all the time and doesnt like her mother, i mean doesnt like living with them etc.

T2F, make sure your son knows what his mother thinks of him but don't tell him until he's through all his exams.

I don't object to the maintenance I pay. But having bought her a house, to house him, after three years she sold it and rented a place instead. £145,000 equity - all gone. All of it. Now she cries because she is poor. Funnily enough, I don't give a shiny sh*te and regard it as my son's inheritance (part of it any way) she has p*ssed away.

Sibaroni, that is terrible. Tell your son when he grows up.

what she spend it on? Flash car? Jewellery? Botox? Spa? Expensive holidays? They live in a fantasy world due to all that celebrity guff they take in.

Do not worry Gallivanter, thats a given. Not until he is at least 18 though.

Most of those Heath. Plus a £50,000 investment in her then new man's mate, property venture. He, and his mate, were both current bankrupts at the time of this splendid plan.

sorry to hear that, sib - sounds like you're well out of it at least.

kick him out - hes 18 ffs- give him 3 months ultiumatum- only way he will grow up


i was out of the nest by then and earning my way


whats wrong with todays parents ffs??????????
you r all breeding a bunch of near do wells - and its your fault- not theirs!

I'm not kicking him out.
I want him to go to Uni.

Imfao........outside world is more dangerous now....guns, knives, more drugs, worse std's(aids), more organised gangs ...

Oh ...and....










































katie Price.... :0

Fuming here.
I won't sleep now. :(

tentofollwer you were over the moon a couple of weeks back that he was coming to xmas dinner, now you inherited him long term great present imho

sibaroni.....start telling him now .....bit by bit....but tell him not to say anything to his mother....to avoid hassle...

Gallivanter 10 Jan 22:04
T2F, make sure your son knows what his mother thinks of him but don't tell him until he's through all his exams.
...........................................................................

wtf is that going to solve apart from causing more arguments and distress?
imo that is the sort of action that comes back to haunt the person who starts it.
...............................................................................

And to Tess, I'm glad you were big enough to apologise.

Just been through the same thing myself so this is all still a bit of a sore subject for me.

All down to brain development. They don't get the risk assessment/rationality circuits firmly established until early-mid 20s. Shut your eyes and hope for the best.

Cool it. You're all stupid and irrational. In a few years all this will mean nothing. Why not advance a few years and pretend it never happened?

he will go back home with his mother (NAP)

:(

Fair play to anyone who brings their kid up as a lone parent. As long as the child is brought up the correct way and turns out decent ;)

nice to see tess apologise but she jumped in with her size 10s and stamped a bit, about par for the female race imo

Update.
She rang me today and said she hadn't slept so she'd rung in sick.

She was going to ask him back as she couldn't afford to pay maintenance.
I told her not to bother paying.

My son texted me to say that he would go back.
I texted him back and told him not to go there and I didn't care about money, just his wellbeing.

Clearly today's fish 'n' chip paper. :)

good job you arent just pleased to get your son back........

of course. :)

wd nice one gl