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Embrace my corrupt old arms, welcome the match-stick-like efforts of my poor wizzened legs, let your good intentions pour down my shrunken torso, let my finest thoughts shrink-wrap what's left of your frontal cortex. Why not pour kerosene over ourselves and take the difficult way out?
Lenusafiver - no, make that 20!
Lenusafiver - no, make that 20!
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well said, wasnt that michael foots opening campaign gambit?
no Yorky...it was bodil talkin a load of boll-ox.......
Would this be a good time to discuss backdated pocket money you owe me before you peg out?
lol, are you sure it had a ring of foot about it, the wizzenned legs bit especially
no Yorky...politicians dont take the easy way out....it was not him,def Bodil talkin sh-ite...def
It was a typing error. He meant wizzed on legs, he's very old and the bladder control and aim have gone.
lol again lager, if we had chit chat comedy league ladders youd be in the top slot
I will hunt you down and kill you all. I think it's in the Tories' election manifesto. Pretty certain in fact. It is now.
You wouldn't think bodil is only 29 would you?
According to his myspace page, bodil's real name is Colin and he lives with his Auntie Mabel in Kettering. He works as a childrens entertainer. His hobbies include Morris Dancing, making airfix models and devil worship. He has no children but does have a pet goldfish called Malcolm.
HRH - as with most of these things, there were a few similarities. Especially the Morris Dancers. But I will eat your brains if we meet. I'm short of the myelin sheath fatty acids. Sorry. I liked you.
Oh well, it had to happen. If anyone is going to eat my brains I'm glad it's you, sadly you won't get much of a meal so I will leave you a pasty too.
That's the kindest thing someone's done for me this year. Could you add a bit of onion marmelade, please?
No problem. You may as well have the last Mr Kipling individual cherry bakewell too. I won't be needing it as I'll be getting killed to death soon.
I prefer the "finest" Sainsburys' bakewells - but it would be churlish to refuse your kind offer. Hey....
What a guy. You are single handedly making people reassess the ill informed stereotypical negativity they feel towards homicidal maniacs.
I feel a lot of murder victims have got what they deserve by mistakingly trying to pacify psychopaths with happy shopper goods.
Ha! I'm still alive! Thank heavens for that jar of dodgy back to basics onion chutney that has been festering away in the back of the fridge for years. Anyone know how to dispose of a body?
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